Justin's Question
by NightOwlGirl
Summary: Entry in the Saint's Sequels Contests! Justin wants to go visit the Flock again. But, in exchange for a portal, he has to ask Fang one little question . . .


**Diclaimer: I don't own any of the Maximum Ride characters, those belong to JP. I don't own any of the Twilight characters, those belong to Stephanie Meyer. I don't own Justin, Spiffy, Pooky, Saint (duh), Magic Mirror, Night Quills, or anything else associated with St. Fang of Boredom's FanFics, that all belongs to St. Fang of Boredom. And, since this is an entry in the Saint's Sequels Contest, I have incorporated a lot of her stuff. Basically? I own nothing. **

**Wow, that's a lot. Kinda depressing . . . Anyways! On with the story!**

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Justin's Question

(Takes place as if Justin never imprinted upon, married, and had kids with Nudge, and Angel never joined the Volturi. Instead, he did the boring thing and went home to Rosalie and Emmet. Or, at least, boring for now . . .)

Justin was terribly bored.

Some people might ask, "How can you be bored? You live with vampires! You're friends with werewolves! You have wings, and can fly! Your biological parents are both guys!"

Well, it's simple. Werewolves were too focused on their imprintees to be really good friends with Justin. Jake had Renesmee, Sam had Emily, Quil had Claire. And out of the ones who hadn't imprinted, Seth was busy placating his bitchy sister, Leah, and Embry had mysteriously vanished.

The vampires weren't much fun, either. Bella and Edward couldn't stop disappearing into their cozy cottage (Emmet had given it another nickname, but for the sake of the fic rating, we won't include it) for long intervals of time. Justin had a pretty good idea of what was happening in there, and he stayed far _**far**_ away. Alice was too busy shopping to pay him any attention. Jasper didn't come close to Justin, for fear of losing control and going abso-freaking-lutely _psycho_ on Justin's main blood vessels. Carlisle always had his nose in a medical book, or was in the middle of writing one of his own. Esme spent all of her time with interior design, puzzling over whether it was possible for red and blue to go together without looking like a 4th of July parade. And, though Emmet tried to be nice, he sometimes forgot that Justin even though Justin was stronger than most humans, he was still very, _very_ breakable. Let's just say that it's a good thing Justin healed fast.

The only one who made time for Justin was Rosalie. This was unfortunate because she spent all of her time holding a bitchiness contest with Leah, and telling Justin about the terrible Royce King Jr., and the horrible way in which she killed him. All in all, not a fun time.

And his biological parents? Well, Fang was a total deadbeat who refused to acknowledge Justin's existence. Forget paying the child support! And there was Iggy. He had met Iggy before, and the rest of the Flock. It had been so much fun! Not at all boring, like today . . .

All the sudden, Justin had an idea.

"Emmet? Rosalie? Can I go to the Maximum Ride section and visit the Flock?"

Rosalie glared at Emmet. "See? I _told _you so! You aren't paying him any attention, and now he wants to go back to the Maximum Ride section! God, Emmet, this is my _kid!_ I can't just have another one when he runs away! I'm a vampire! I've got long, flowing hair, a supermodel's body, a stunning face, superhuman powers, and I'll never age, but I _can't have kids!_ And then we adopt, and now, because of _you_, our kid is leaving! And I'll never get another, and it's because _YOU_ didn't listen to me! And now, I get to say I told you so! _I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO! . . . "_

Emmet, used to this sort of thing, tuned her out. Turning to Justin, he said "Sure! You remember the location of Spiffy and Pooky, right?"

"Yep!" replied Justin.

"Okay, bye! Be back within a few months!"

And with that, Justin ran outside and leaped into the sky.

* * *

A few hours later, he landed in the familiar clearing in which he found Spiffy and Pooky the first time. There was the wigwam, the fire, but where were the intrepid explorers?

"BOO!"

Justin screeched, spun around, and crouched into a karate pose he learned from a movie.

"Whoa, whoa! We just wanted to scare you! Don't go all ninja on our butts!" said Pooky the Penguin, holding up his wings. Then, he muttered under his breath, "We _did_ scare you, though . . ."

"You did not scare me! Just . . . self defense? You know, pretend you're taken by surprise, and all that?" said Justin, whose red face contradicted every word he just said.

"Uh-huh. I'm sure," said Spiffy the Hobbit.

"Yes, you're sure - wait. What happened to your accent?" asked Justin.

"That, sir, is unimportant. What _is_ important, however, is you. What brings you to this out-of-the-way clearing today?" Spiffy wanted to know.

"Well, I wanted to visit the Maximum Ride section again!" Justin told the duo.

"Hold up," Pooky cut in, "Do your parents know that you're here?"

"Emmet said I just had to be back within a few months."

"_Excellent_ parenting," grumbled Spiffy.

"Well, _anyone_ is better than that deadbeat, Fang," said Pooky.

"Hmm, I guess you're right," Spiffy said.

"Guys! Can we stop arguing about my parents and talk about how to get to the Maximum Ride section? All I need to do is find this Saint person again, right?" said Justin.

Spiffy and Pooky broke away from their side conversation to look at him.

"Well . . ."

"I don't know . . ."

"It might be hard . . ."

"Do you think she'll . . ."

"Well, maybe one way . . ."

"Hmm, I suppose . . ."

"CAN YOU STOP WITH THE MEANINLESS FRAGMENTS AND SAY SOMETHING I CAN UNDERSTAND" screamed Justin.

"No need to get snappy," said Pooky, "We were just getting to that point."

"See, the thing is that it's Saint we're talking about. She always has a reason for everything. She let you through that one time for Embry Call's phone number and a good idea for a FanFiction. I'm not sure if you have anything else that she needs. And, so, she might not give you another portal. And, we don't know any other writers powerful enough to get you through," explained Spiffy.

"Well, I want to try," declared Justin.

Spiffy and Pooky shrugged.

"Okay," they said in unison.

And with that, the three set out on the journey to Saint.

* * *

Saint looked up from Magic Mirror, which had been showing her what was happening over by Spiffy and Pooky.

"Hmm," she said, "What could I get from Justin?"

She stood up and paced back and forth. How could she use this deal to her advantage? What sort of information or blackmail or idea could she get from this? All the sudden, her gaze fell back upon Magic Mirror. She thought about how Magic Mirror could see everywhere. The Mirror could even record what it saw!

And with this thought, Saint had a genius idea.

* * *

After a long and tiring trip, Justin, Spiffy, and Pooky arrived at Saint's clearing. It looked almost identical since the last time they visited, with only one minor difference: Saint wasn't there.

"Oh, great. We go all this way, only to find that she's not even here! That's just _perfect!_" said a slightly angry Justin.

Then came a swirl of black smoke, like a mini tornado, a *poof*, and a girl in a dark cloak appeared.

"Who's not here?" asked the girl.

Spiffy and Pooky chuckled.

"Nobody's missing now!" said Spiffy.

Saint smiled. "So, you need a portal to the Maximum Section?"

"How'd you know?" asked Justin.

"I have my ways. Now, I will give you a portal, but in return you must do me a favor. You must ask Fang a question." said Saint.

Justin shrugged. "Sure, that should be easy enough. What's the question?"

Saint motioned for him to come closer. As soon as he was close enough, she leaned over and whispered something in his ear.

"You got that?" she asked?

Justin nodded, not getting the big deal.

Saint smiled, and with a wave of her hand summoned a huge portal. "Have fun!" she said, as Justin dove in.

As soon as Justin was gone, Spiffy and Pooky looked at her. They, with their amazing sense of hearing, had heard her question.

"How in the world do you come up with these things?" asked Pooky.

Saint grinned evily. "Years of practice. Now, come on! Let's go watch and see what happens!"

And with that, the three of them ran over to Magic Mirror.

* * *

Justin was launched out of the portal, and hurtled to a not-so-graceful stop outside of a small house. He stood up, brushed the dirt off of his pants, and looked around him.

"This must be the Flock's current safe house!" he said to himself.

Justin walked up to the door and rang the doorbell. The door swung open, revealing a familiar face.

"Iggy?"

"Justin?" Iggy said.

"He's back?" asked Max.

"YES! MY SON HAS RETURNED!" Iggy screamed, and then began sobbing as he pulled Justin into the house.

"Dammit," Fang muttered from the kitchen, "I thought you were just making stuff up . . ."

Iggy was incomprehensible through his sobs, so Max came over.

"Welcome to the Flock, Justin. Here's what you need to know: Fang mysteriously disappears for months at a time and never talks, I'm in charge, Gazzy WILL blow up your pants if you leave them in the laundry room for too long, Nudge can talk your ears off, Angel is a demon, and nobody thinks that Iggy is really blind with how well he goes along. Also, stop plotting "Parent Trap" style, Fang is MINE. So, make yourself at home!"

* * *

" . . . and _then_ guess what he did?"

"What?"

"He stuck the stick in his -"

"ENOUGH WITH THE EMBARRASSING STORIES!" Fang screamed.

"But Fa-a-ang!" whined Iggy, "It's _fun_ to embarrass you in front of your son!"

"Fun for you," Fang muttered.

Iggy nodded, "If it was fun for you, no one else would like it!"

Fang sighed, and put his head in his hands.

* * *

It had been about a week, and Justin never wanted to leave. And although Emmett said a few months, Justin knew that if he didn't leave soon, Rose would get pissy. Or, pissy-er than normal. And nobody wanted that. There was only one thing he had to do for Saint, though . . .

Nudge's voice broke his train of thought. "Okay everyone! Ella and Angel and I decided on the movie! We're watching Twilight! And yes, Max, this includes you. If you refuse, Angel is going to bring out her mind control. And nobody wants that. Especially not you. Remember last time? That was hilarious. For us, at least. You, well . . . not so much. It was like the one time, with the Erasers! THAT was hilarious. The look on his face? Priceless! I wish I had a picture, like one of those hidden camera shows! I love those shows. Remember that one episode, on the one show we watched? Or that other episode? Gosh, we've watched a bunch of episodes. But, that show is funny. Like that other show-" Nudge was cut off by Max, who had slapped her hand over Nudge's mouth.

"So long as you stop talking? I'll go willingly," said Max, and they all filed into the living room.

Justin decided not to watch the movie, seeing as though he already knew the ending since he lived with the Cullens. Instead he followed Fang, who had slunk silently and unnoticed up to his bedroom.

Justin opened the room door, and slipped inside. His first impression? Black. Black walls, black bedsheets, black furniture, black laptop that Fang was currently typing on. Fang looked up, saw it was only Justin, and went back to what he was doing.

"So, you aren't watching the movie?" asked Justin.

"Nope."

"Are you working on your blog?"

"Yep."

"Are you enjoying yourself?

"Yep."

"You don't talk much, do you?"

"Nope."

Justin let out an exasperated sigh. Then he decided, well, he had Fang all alone. Now would be the perfect time to ask Fang Saint's question.

"Hey Fang? Can I ask you something?"

"Nope."

"Please? It's really important."

"Nope."

"I'll leave you alone if you answer it."

Fang looked up, and snapped shut his laptop. "Do you promise?"

"Absolutely."

Fang let out a sigh. "Fine. What's your question?"

". . . What's a Midol?"

Justin had never known a person could change colors so fast. First Fang was white, then green, then red.

"What?" Justin asked.

Fang remained silent, a strangled look on his face.

Realization dawned on Justin. "I know! Midol isn't a _what_, it's a _who_! No, Midol's a _she_!" Justin remembered back to all of Iggy's stories, and continued, "I bet Midol has long red hair! And she doesn't have wings! And Max _doesn't know!_"

Fang let out a garbled noise.

Justin jumped up. "I'm gonna tell the rest of the Flock!" And with that, he sprinted down the stairs and across the hall to the living room.

Justin heard Fang jump up a half second later, saying "Justin! No, wait! It's not that!", but Justin just ran faster. He knew how this would go. If he was gullible and stopped, Fang would tackle him, and maybe kill him to keep the secret! Justin ran even faster.

He skidded into the living room where Iggy, Gazzy, Ella, Dr. Martinez, Nudge, Angel, and Max were watching the movie.

"FANG'S DATING MIDOL!" he screamed at the top of his lungs.

Everyone's eyes shot to Fang as he arrived, too late. Angel reached out and hit "pause" on the remote.

Max's eyebrows went up, and she looked from Fang to Justin. Nudge, Gazzy, and Iggy looked confused at first, but then realization appeared on their faces, apparently Angel clued them in. An evil grin appeared on Iggy's face.

"Fang, Fang, Fang," said Max, shaking her head sadly. "First the Night Quills, now this! Gazzy, I now give you full permission to begin an intervention."

Fang just groaned, and slid down the wall until he was sprawled on the floor.

* * *

A few days later, Justin was back at Saint's camp. As much as he wanted to stay with the Flock, he needed to go. Rose was waiting.

Of course, this had nothing to do with the death glares he had been getting recently from Fang.

Saint walked out of her tent, smiling hugely. "Justin," she said, "that was perfect. Now, did you have fun?"

"Yep!" replied Justin.

"Good. Seeing as though Spiffy and Pooky are busy, I'll just conjure up a portal back to the Cullen house. Good-bye!" said Saint. One hand flourish later, another portal appeared in the sky.

"Bye Saint! Thanks for everything!" said Justin, and then he jumped through the portal.

As soon as the portal disappeared, Saint threw back her head and let out an evil cackle.

She had recorded the whole event on Magic Mirror.

* * *

Once again, Justin found himself being catapulted out of a portal. And once again, he found that his landing lacked any sort of grace whatsoever. Unlike the last time, however, he was right outside the front door of the Cullen house.

He recognized Emmett's face peering through the window by the front door. The door swung open, and as he stepped inside, Emmett yelled, "ROSE YOU OWE ME! I TOLD YOU HE'D COME BACK!"

Two days later, Justin was in the living room of the Cullen house with Emmett. Emmett was watching sports, and Justin was, like always, completely bored.

All the sudden, a thought occurred to him.

He never had found out was a Midol was . . .

"Hey Emmett? What's Midol?"

* * *

**So, how'd you like it?**

**Tell me in a . . .**

**R&R!  
**


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